Moving Day

I woke up this morning hearing all the Munchkins sing, "...and KAN-sas she says is the n-a-a-a-a-me of the star..."

Dorothy may have been able to say "Well, it really was no miracle: what happened was just this..."--but from my perspective here at 6:30am Central Time, it WILL be a miracle for us to get to Kansas. :-) The day began at 6am after a fitful night's sleep; as I let the dogs out for their morning constitutional before breakfast, I didn't notice that a cute little squirrel was in the backyard nibbling on the clover that grows so avidly in the middle of what's supposed to be a lawn of bluegrass. I opened the patio door; the squirrel headed for the telephone pole in the back corner; the dogs headed for the squirrel, barking ferociously; I headed for the dogs, in my nightgown and bare feet, and added to the clamor of the dawn by trying to get them to be quiet. The neighbors would probably rate it a toss-up as to who was louder--the dogs, or me shushing them.

The movers will arrive between 8 and 10am to begin packing all our stuff into boxes; we've tried to segregate What Will Go With Us In The Car from Things To Be Packed. I have no doubt that we've only been partially successful in that endeavor and will be praying for discernment as we stand among a lot of boxes on Friday in our Fairway house and hunt for Things We Need And Should Have Had With Us.

The dogs and I will be spending much of the day at Andrea's apartment, since the alternative (our dogs with strangers coming in and out of the front door at random) isn't pleasant. Tim will oversee the proceedings at our house. This will be the first of our three moves that he will be present for, having been out of town for the last two, and in the depths of my sinful heart I am aware that I amhappy--nay, even GLEEFUL--that this time HE gets to deal with the movers, in the even more sinful hope that after this experience he will be so deeply grateful for what I have had to endure twice before that he will shower me with adulation.

(You're all thinking that I can use the time at Andrea's for reflection upon my corrupt state...and you would be SO right.)

So...that's our day. Tomorrow will be similar, except the boxes will be loaded into the van along with everything else. In 36 hours it will be Tim, me, 3 dogs, an Aerobed, 3 doggie pillows, and the aforementioned What Will Go With Us In The Car camping out for one last night at 7107 Cheshire Lane, St. Louis, MO. Thursday we drive the Yellow Brick Road known as I-70 to Fairway. Please pray for safety as we go.

Lions and Tigers and Bears...Oh, My!

Interesting... When you buy a house in Kansas, all of a sudden all these random quotes from The Wizard of Oz (probably the State Movie) pop in your head. And your husband finds it amusing to call you "Dorothy."

The process of buying a house reminds me of the journey that Dorothy and her friends made through the forest while they uttered the title of this blog. I feel like that today. There are details and post-its and State Farm--oh, my! Appraisals and termites and taxes--oh, my! Closings and movers and contracts--oh, my!

I had a list of phone calls to make today to either (1) give information to someone; or (2) receive information from someone. In the midst of it, I was waiting for the appraiser to come to finish his report. One party who had information I needed to give to another party wasn't answering. The appraiser was now 20 minutes later than he said he would be.

In the middle of all this, my heart was anxious and irritated and annoyed that all this untidiness was swirling around in my brain.

And in the kindness of God, He used this circumstance speak to my heart and say, 'It's here in the midst of all this clutter that you have the opportunity to respond like Christ."

How gracious of Him to drop those words into the swirl and bring the peace that passes understanding! It changed my perspective on the afternoon.

What a holy, happy life is this!

"Give us this day our daily bread."

Matthew 6:11

God will have us live a life of daily faith upon His bounty. If we would live a life of holy victory amid the daily conflict of the flesh--we must live a life of daily faith upon Jesus, a life of daily waiting upon God."

THIS day, my Father! The supplies of yesterday are exhausted; those of tomorrow I leave with You. Give me this day all that its circumstances may demand.
Give me . . .
the clearness of judgment,
the soundness of decision,
the resoluteness of will,
the integrity of principle,
the uprightness of heart,
the moral courage,
the Christlike meekness,
the holy love,
the watchfulness and prayerfulness,
the integrity and consistency,
its yet unshaped history may require.
I know not . . .
what temptations I shall be exposed to,
what foes I shall be assailed by,
what trials I shall pass through,
what clouds will shade,
what sorrows will embitter,
what circumstances will wound my spirit.
Lord, give me . . .
grace,
strength,
love,
guidance,
faith.
Give me this day my daily bread."

What a holy, happy life is this!

It removes all care from the mind but the present; and for that present, the believer hangs upon a Father's care! Thus begin and continue your day with God.
Its history is all . . .
undeveloped,
uncertain, and
untraced.
You cannot . . .
foresee one step,
be certain of one circumstance,
or control one event.

Let your prayer be, "Give me, Lord, all supplies for this day.
I may have . . .
trials of my judgment,
trials of my affections,
trials of conscience,
trials of my principles,
trials from those I most tenderly love.
Lord, be with me, guide me with Your counsel,
hold up my steps that they slide not,
let Your comforts delight my soul."

Day by day is the life of faith you are to live upon Jesus.
It is DAILY bread . . .
Jesus for each and for every day.
Jesus for each day's needs.
Jesus for each day's trials.
Jesus for each day's sins.
Jesus for life.
Jesus for death.
Jesus forever!

Octavius Winslow, The Lord's Prayer, 1866

4624 West 61st Street

Here it is: God's provision for us in Fairway, Kansas! We are so aware of His tender care for us through this transition of moving and praise Him for His abundant goodness.

There's a Song In My Heart Tonight

GRACE UNMEASURED

(1) Grace unmeasured, vast and free, that knew me from eternity,
that called me out before my birth, to bring You glory on this earth.
Grace amazing, pure and deep, that saw me in my misery,
that took my curse and owned my blame, so I could bear Your righteous name.

CHORUS
Grace paid for my sins and brought me to life.
Grace clothes me with pow'r to do what is right.
Grace will lead me to heav'n where I'll see Your face,
and never cease to thank You for Your grace.

(2) Grace abounding, strong and true, that makes me long to be like You,
that turns me from my selfish pride, to love the cross on which You died.
Grace unending, all my days, You'll give me strength to run this race.
And when my years on earth are through, the praise will all belong to You.

Words and Music by Bob Kauflin

Copyright 2005 Sovereign Grace Praise (BMI). Sovereign Grace Music, a division of Sovereign Grace Ministries. From Worship God Live. All rights reserved. International copyright secured. North American administration by Integrity Music. International administration by CopyCare International.

Off to Kansas City

It's Friday morning. Today at 3pm the movers come for a preliminary walk-through to see what all we'll be moving. As soon as they're finished, Tim and I are heading for Kansas City for a weekend of househunting.

I'm struggling with anxiety over finding a house. We will turn over the keys to the house that I'm sitting in (and that I have come to love dearly) in 20 days. And I find my frail heart quavering about where and what (and the all-important WHEN) the next house will be.

Let's see...I've been homeless HOW many days in my life??? Oh, yeah. Zero.

We've moved HOW many times in our married life??? This makes #3. And during that time we spent HOW many nights in our car due to a lack of provision??

(sigh)

While we are praying for "daily bread" (which for us is a house in the KC Metro area, in the right place at the right price with the right features), more than anything I want us to walk through this transitory process with the faith of little children who wake up on Christmas morning, hands open and outstretched, eagerly and excitedly waiting for whatever their Father places in their hands. He is the Giver of All Good Gifts, and He does all things well, and I want so much to receive what He gives us with joy, thanksgiving, contentment, and gratitude--even if it is very different from what we are currently picturing in our minds. I want to remember that our perspective is so very limited, and His is infinite; our motives are so mixed, and His desires for us are pure; our wisdom is given by Him but tainted by our flesh, and His wisdom is perfect.

The sovereignty of God has been my sure path these last several days. My thoughts are tempted to stray to that desolate Land of "What if...?" My only hope is to look down at the sure Rock under my feet: God is Sovereign. And look! There's another Rock just like it, one step in front of me. And another...and another.

I know that God loves to hear the praises of His people in the midst of a challenging time (I can't call what we're going through a trial; it feels like a less secure place than others in our life, but I know that in comparison, it's not even close to a trial), but I admit that I am very much looking forward to being able to praise Him from the other side of this!

The Unerring Hand of Infinite Wisdom

"My purpose will stand, and I will do all that I please."

Isaiah 46:10

Nothing is so calming and comforting to the Christian pilgrim, as the assurance of Divine Guidance in every, even the most minute circumstances which befall him.

Without this perception of his heavenly Father's care, a thousand intricacies must beset his path. He must be staggered at almost every step. But when he beholds, by faith--the unerring hand of infinite wisdom, wielding the stupendous machine of human events--causing everything to promote the spiritual good of His people--then he quiets himself as a little child, and can say with cheerful resignation, "Father, not my will, but yours be done."

In such a world of change and trial, how inestimable is a calm reliance on the wisdom, power, and love of God. It fully compensates for the lack of temporal ease and wealth. If, without our heavenly Father, not even a sparrow can fall to the ground; if the very hairs of our head are all numbered--how composed should we be.

The reins of universal nature are in the hands of Infinite Love! This vast complex machine is guided by Infinite Wisdom and Power! The Almighty Ruler of the sky cannot be taken by surprise. Nothing unforeseen can happen to cross His purposes or thwart His designs. All worlds are open to His view.

If this Great and Glorious Being is our Father and our Friend--then our privilege is to rejoice at all times, and in everything to give thanks. How consoling and encouraging is the assurance that the blessed Redeemer of my soul, is the Great Sovereign of the Universe! Without His permission nothing can happen in the vast dominion over which He sways His scepter! To His will every creature must bow--either in willing obedience, or in just and endless punishment!

"Lord, be pleased to impart unto me, your unworthy servant, this spirit of confidence in You. May I see Your hand in all the events of life--ordering the the minor, as well as in the greater movements of Your Providence. This watching and waiting for the manifestations of Your guardian care--will fill me with thankfulness for all my mercies, and make me patient under all my trials."

"My times are in Your hands."

Psalm 31:15

(Thomas Reade, The Sovereignty of God)

God is Good!

We celebrated our 7th anniversary yesterday (Sunday) by hosting an Open House to sell our home...and God has brought a buyer. After only 2 weeks on the market, we're just one tick away from signing a contract; we made a counteroffer on a very small point and are waiting to hear if it's acceptable to the buyer. If so, we'll head to Kansas City this weekend to look for housing there. Right now the closing date is June 28th. (Yes, just 24 days away...)

This move is giving us an opportunity to walk out our faith (as does every situation that God puts us in.) It's not a realtor or a person who has the power to hold us hostage by either agreeing or refusing to buy our house. It's God alone who sovereignly and graciously brings what we need.

Now we have the chance to trust God for the provision of a house in the Kansas City Metro area. We've begun to look at houses on realtor.com and have decided on an area to begin our search.

It's a great adventure!

I Got Dressed Yesterday, and Today, Too

I've been struggling. I thought I've been keeping it hidden but since I'm so deceived, I've probably been deceiving myself about that. (See Jeremiah 17:9 about that.) Regardless, of late I've been having a hard time locating a reason to get out of bed, get dressed, or do much of anything constructive. This really is not like me or so I'd like to think.

I think these past 16 months have been a stretch. Who could've foreseen unemployment at this stage of life, let alone 16 months of it? But then, why not? All around me I see people going through much more difficult and significant issues than what's happening in our little corner of life. Why would I think we should be untouched by the effects of a sin-filled world? Why wouldn't it be our turn to be in a position to turn our eyes to Christ and learn what it means to fully trust Him for all our needs? But for God and His gracious kindness and mercy, where would we be? To whom could we turn? Our God is a faithful God and worthy to be praised. He has supplied each and every need, in abundance, and right on time.

I found this little message from Rick Ezell to be helpful. His words bring helpful perspective.

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But It's Mine . . . Wrong!
by Rick Ezell

As subjects of God's kingdom, our time on earth, along with our energy, intelligence, opportunities, relationships, and resources are all gifts from God. He has entrusted all these things to our care and management. The first job God gave humans was to manage and take care of God's "stuff" on earth. This role has never been rescinded. Everything we enjoy is to be treated as a trust that God has placed in our hands.

From the beginning of Scripture we are reminded over and over again that God owns it all. He created it. He owns it. It belongs to him.

Yet everyday we face the temptation to play the part of the owner. Here is where the dark side of ownership is manifested, and trusteeship is often abandoned.

In the final book of the trilogy The Lord of the Rings, J. R. R. Tolkien introduces the tragic figure of Lord Denethor, chief steward of the kingdom of Gondor. Denethor has ordered Gondor's affairs for years while waiting on the coming king. But as he waited, he grew comfortable of the throne-and reluctant to relinquish it. When the new king arrives, Denethor refuses to step down. In the film version, the wise counselor Gandalf rebukes him: "Authority is not given you to deny the rule of the king, Steward." Denethor shouts back: "Rule of Gondor is mine and no other's!"

Desperate to cling to what was not his own, Denethor lost sight of his rightful place. His life is symbolic of the small and pathetic existence of those who forget they are trustees and think of themselves-like God-owners.

God's view of your life and mine is that of a trust. God has never said to humanity, "All this is yours." Instead, he says, "All this is mine. But I am entrusting it to you. Use it to honor and serve me." You and I would be most wise to draw clear lines between investing and exploitation, between management and control, between caretaking and domination, between use and waste. You and I would be well advised to remember that all we possess is a gift from God. It is ours on loan, not ours to own.

Subscription info at www.rickezell.net