True Friendship Is None of that Sissy Stuff

So I get this in my inbox today from BF Jennie in Kansas City . . . (thanks so much; just had to pass it along to the rest of the posse and all other members of the Sisterhood out there in bloggerland) --

Are you tired of those sissy 'friendship' poems that always sound good,
But never actually come close to reality?

Well, here is a series of promises that actually speak of true friendship.
You will see no cutesy little smiley faces on this card-
Just the stone cold truth of our great friendship.

1. When you are sad -- I will jump on the person who made you sad
like a spider monkey.

2. When you are blue -- I will try to dislodge whatever is choking you.

3. When you smile -- I will know you are plotting something that I must be involved in.

4. When you are scared -- I will rag on you about it every chance I get.

5. When you are worried -- I will tell you horrible stories about how much Worse it could be until you quit whining.

6. When you are confused -- I will use little words.

7. When you are sick -- Stay away from me until you are well
again. I don't want whatever you have.

8. When you fall -- I will point and laugh at your clumsiness.